Adam

Adam (the dominant of the keymaster triad) uses the handles demiurgeCarnate, theHighblood, cantankerousGenetics, twoAwesome, and turntequeGodhead. His hobbies primarily incorporate trolling, expanding on troll culture, and discovering loopholes (a detail required only to their addiction to getting into near-impossible arguments and weasling his fat ass out of it).

As a young lad, Adam took to intoxicating himself heavily with various lethal drugs and wrestling crocodiles. In the interest of capturing the hearts of ladies, he started practicing an oppressive mannerism towards chivalry and prudence.